kilroy: (Default)
Dear Hollywood:

I think you and I need to have a talk. I've noticed something missing from your work lately, and it worries me a lot: basic humanity. I'm not talking about the fact that a lot of your headliners are now digitally animated Smurfs-- I've been watching cartoons since I was tiny, I have no problems with that. I'm talking about trying to connect to the audience via empathy. You appear to have lost the knack.

I'm even noticing this in action and horror movies now. You don't exactly need a lot of character depth in a shoot 'em up or a slasher pic, but there has to be something. A single truly emotive expression. A snarky line delivered out of frustration. One moment where the characters step out of their genre and the audience recognizes them as more than walking cliches. Just a few seconds, that's all it takes for us to care.

But we haven't even been getting that. Those few seconds require a confluence of modest competency between the writer, the director, and the actors-- and that's the problem. You're failing on the most basic possible level of storytelling. We can't suspend our disbelief if we don't have someone in the film to latch onto. And if we can't pretend to ourselves that your world is in some way real then the whole exercise is pointless. You just spent however many millions of dollars on a movie when you could have just made the trailer and the posters and we all would have been happier.

Remember who you are. You are not landscape photography. You are not documentary war footage. You are not a Magic Eye painting. You're a dream of a writer performed by actors, filmed by a director, and seen by an audience. You're people all the way through. All you have to do is acknowledge it.
kilroy: (Default)
I'm getting really burned out on the "chosen one" plot. Especially the chosen one with super-powers. Extra-especially if the super-powers are exceptional even in an existing community of super-powers. Most especially if the chosen one is also an orphan. There are other ways to make your protagonist interesting-- a well-developed personality springs immediately to mind.

This message brought to you by Lost Girl.
kilroy: (Default)
I want a three month period, preferably during the summer, where no movie has a connection to any existing franchise. Movies based on books are fine as long as they're not intended to exploit the book's existing audience.

I want wonder, not nostalgia. It's such a fundamental element of fiction, and yet there's been so little of it to go around recently.
kilroy: (Default)
Remaking Excalibur?

It's not that I don't love that movie far more than it's worth, but this is frigging Arthurian mythology, people. It's like a cultural hall pass saying "Sure, tell the story however you want!" Why would you need to remake a movie from the 80s when you could just, you know, reimagine it yourself?
kilroy: (Default)
So, they may be remaking Yellow Submarine. This once again falls into the category of "Just no."

On the other hand, they're doing this for Wizard of Oz, which I think is lovely and appropriate.

Respect what came before, but then go out and do something else.
kilroy: (Default)
No.

I'm trying to find something else to say, but it's like trying to explain that the sky isn't made of beef jerky.
kilroy: (Default)
Racism in the Transformers.

I was going to post something snide, and then I was going to post something about how common this kind of thing is and why it happens, but now I'm just going to say "Lazy writing, guys," and move on.

Wow

Apr. 16th, 2009 10:28 am
kilroy: (Default)
That's... the kind of thing I would write for HKAT.
kilroy: (Default)
Chariots of the Gods got optioned as a feature film.

Now, I know that someone buying the rights is a long way from the book actually becoming a movie. And I also know I run a bad movie festival. But seriously, people.

Losers

Feb. 20th, 2009 08:30 am
kilroy: (Default)
Oh please. Yes.

Losers is a great, extremely cinematic comic that could actually be made into a movie and not automatically suck. Also, JDM would be perfect.